Kink or Fetish?
This is a response to a questions sent to us by a curious COA reader:
What’s the difference between a kink and a fetish? Can I have both?
Dear reader,
On this website we’re easy. You can have whatever you like! But I’m afraid we digress, so back to your question:
Both kinks and fetishes might be considered out of the mainstream, especially if you’re a parson, a missionary, or god forbid, your parents. But that said, the main difference between the two is whether you like to do something or need to do something.
A kink is something you LIKE to do while having sex, something that might bring extra energy to the proceedings. A fetish is something that MUST be present for arousal and satisfaction. (For some people with fetishes, just fantasizing about the object or behavior is enough. For others, they must actually engage with an object or scenario).
To illustrate the difference, we might use this example: One night you hear your neighbors having sex and it turns you on. That’s kinky. But if you need to hear others having sex in order to get aroused, that’s a fetish.
A large percentage of the population – gay and straight – have kinks and fetishes. And the proper way to explore them is consensually, with like-minded partner(s) where practice, safety, and boundaries are discussed beforehand. For the adventuresome, there are often groups and societies of like-minded/similarly-fetished people to explore with.
Is there a particular kink or fetish that you’re interested in? Send us a note at info@comingoutasia.com. We’ll be covering this topic in each edition of The Outline and may cover yours!